Wednesday, November 26, 2008

California Grown Turkey

We can only surmise that this turkey is currently doing time in California's penal system. How else to account for the license plate? Clearly, it is a token of the turkey's prison job cranking those things out.

What is the turkey in for? How much time did he get? Did he receive better legal counsel than the zillions of other turkeys serving the ultimate sentence? Was he railroaded, just another miscarriage of justice?

Regardless, what's up with this guy?

Our guess: he's institutionalized, like Brooksie in The Shawshank Redemption. A life of confinement has eroded his self-confidence, rendering him incapable of surviving on the outside. Wherever he turns, he sees four walls. They're inside him now. And so, carrying his prison cell in his head, he can never be free, no matter what the governor says, no matter how the parole board rules.

All of which brings a turkey a certain demented peace. He can never be free, so he may finally rest. He may quit the race. "That's right, world: gobble it up!"

If he should die on Thanksgiving, at least something "good" will have come from his too-short life. And he might finally have the chance to atone for his crimes. Whatever they were.

(Enjoy a second helping of Thanksgiving insanity here.)

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